June 21, 2010

Which Is Healthier: A Dunkin Donuts Bagel, Muffin, or Donut?

dunkin donuts menu.jpgtoo bad the prices aren't also variable




Bagels:


Dunkin Donuts has a "DDSmart" menu, which means it's healthier.  That should be obvious.


bagels.png
Except that there is nothing about the multigraining which makes it healthier.  It has more calories and more fat (due to the oil they need to add to make it soft).  They say "reduced fat cream cheese" only adds 100 cal and half the fat (8g) but that's if the cheese is spread by a bee.



Donuts:

donuts nutrition info.png

Three points:

  1. No worse than the bagels.  More fat, less carbs... you decide.
  2. Anything labeled "cake" or "crumb" should be avoided like the clap.  And if it claims to have a fruit in it, get tested for gonorrhea as well. The apple/blueberry crumb has 470 calories, none of which are delicious.
  3. Most of the other donuts (cruller, frosteds, jelly, pudding kremes (boston, bavarian, etc)-- are all about 250 calories.


Munchkins:

Munchkins all look like this:

munchkin.PNG

i.e. they are identical in proportions to their adult counterparts.  So know thyself: which is more psychologically satisfying, one donut or 5 munchkins?


Muffins:

Muffins are the Matrix's punishment for our arrogance, believing we can make birthday party cupcakes healthier simply by making them larger and renaming them. 
 

blueberry muffins.png

On the positive side, as of October 15, 2007, all DD products were trans fat free.



Cookies:

What I'm about to show you is not suitable for pregnant women or patients recovering from surgery.

Here are the stats on the Triple Chocolate Chunk Cookie, as told by DD (orange and white) and an independent site called Calorie Count:

triple chocolate chunk cookie.PNG

If you add up the fat, carbs, and protein, the DD stats equal 72g, and the Calorie Count stats add to 110g.  The actual cookie I bought today weighs 140g.  So is Dunkin Donuts telling me that the other half of the cookie is water and oxygen?

So I'm going to bake this cookie until it becomes a cracker.  Check back tomorrow for the results of the cookie analysis.

--

http://twitter.com/thelastpsych














Comments

Leave me alone an let me en... (Below threshold)

June 21, 2010 4:49 PM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

Leave me alone an let me enjoy my AIDS free speedball.

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Muffins: cake for breakfast... (Below threshold)

June 21, 2010 10:01 PM | Posted by Aaron Davies: | Reply

Muffins: cake for breakfast. (not mine, comes from some English columnist complaining about how fat British women are getting.)

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Now I know TLP lives in the... (Below threshold)

June 21, 2010 10:08 PM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

Now I know TLP lives in the NE. High five TLP! In new jersey, dunkin donuts are like stop lights, every fucking corner I swear to god.

The answer is, eat absolutely nothing at dunkin donuts. Except coffee, with no sugar added.

For a working person who is on the go, the easy way to fill your belly with food in the morning is to eat mixed nuts with sparing amounts of dried fruit. Grab a handful or two and put it in a snack baggie (don't pay money for prepacked snacks) and you will be full for hours.

If however, you feel like eating garbage because you want to eat garbage because you want cake or your sugar is low and you need to eat something shitty to feel better, then the obvious choice is the munchkin. One munchkin is 60 calories and a few carbs, whereas a bagel or a doughnut are full of carbs and calories and will absolutely destroy your metabolism.

And, if you eat just one munchkin, it is psychologically as satisfying as eating one doughnut. Our minds are programmed to eat "one", it is way easier to eat one munchkin than 1/4th of a doughnut. YOu may end up eating the whole doughnut, or more than you intended at least.

It makes zero sense to eat anything from DD. It all tastes like crap and is radically unhealthY (with partial exception for the egg based meals, as eggs are real food that contain protein and fatty acids and nutrients and will not cause diabetes).
If you are going to eat crap food, at least make sure it tastes good.
Every time I ever ate any doughnut from DD I said to myself "Why am I eating this shit. It tastes terrible. I am going to stop eating this terrible shit now."

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If I'm going to consume tha... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 2:47 AM | Posted by HedgeMage: | Reply

If I'm going to consume that many calories and empty carbs, it's going to be something WAY more fun than Dunkin Donuts.

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This post is a bit 1995. Di... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 4:00 AM | Posted by Kutta: | Reply

This post is a bit 1995. Didn't you know that we ditched the whole case about sat fat and fat in general and now think that n-6 polyunsaturated fat and wheat and simple carbs and too much carbs in general are the baddies.

As to the donut issue, regardless of what certain kind of donut you eat it is among the worst foods ever. Like trying to choose the product that scores a mere -95 in a scale from -100 to 100, instead of another that scores -98. A single Blueberry Muffin contains as much sugar as what I consume in about 5 days.

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At the risk of betraying my... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 4:49 AM | Posted by Ben: | Reply

At the risk of betraying my (and maybe your) elitism, I reckon that anybody who has slogged through the cryptic Matrix references, debunking of psycho-pharmacological methodology and institutions, and quotations of deceased German philosophers taken out of context that constitute the bulk of this (great) blog will not be of the audience that needs to hear this message, and those who DO need to hear it would probably have trouble interpreting it. It's preaching to the choir, and the noble savages who need saving don't speak the language of Reason. Pity.

Here's a variation of the Perfect Game scenario posted a few weeks back that would interest me: You (Portugal) are playing in the World Cup against N. Korea, and you've already scored, let's say, two goals and are dominating the game. Do you: a) maintain a two-goal lead and play conservatively, or b) give 'em the business and score another 5, yielding a 7-0 result, in all likelihood condemning the other side to a few months in a reeducation camp?

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Now I know TLP lives in ... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 8:53 AM | Posted, in reply to Anonymous's comment, by Fail: | Reply

Now I know TLP lives in the NE. High five TLP!

There are dunkin donuts in the south east, as far south as key west.

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Dunkin Donuts carries Tropi... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 8:57 AM | Posted by Nancy Lebovitz: | Reply

Dunkin Donuts carries Tropicana orange juice, which I believe is made entirely from oranges.

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In a slight defense of the ... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 9:15 AM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

In a slight defense of the Multigrain bagel, it does provide for an overall healthier meal. If you look at it only on the surface, yeah it looks worse than a plain bagel. But let's break it down more:

Fats: Yes, it has a higher percentage of fats. But the majority of the fats in the bagel are either poly- or monounsaturated fats, which are critical to our diets.

Sodium: The sodium content in the DDSmart bagel is lower. Hooray.

Carbs: To many people that choose the multigrain bagel, carbs aren't evil things that make you fat. I'm a runner, so carbs are an important component to my diet. To me, it makes sense that the "healthier" bagel has more complex carbs. I'm also fairly certain that DD carries a low-carb bagel for those concerned about carbs. And if you're concerned about carbs and you're ordering a bagel anyway, I don't even know.

Fiber/Protein: The multigrain also boasts a higher percentage in both of these categories; also important to an active diet.

The moral of the story: the DDSmart bagel is the best option for active people. If you're on a diet and watching your carbs and fat, you probably shouldn't be in a Dunkin Donuts anyway.

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One should notice that the ... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 9:22 AM | Posted by John Duncan: | Reply

One should notice that the bagel has 9g of dietary fiber, while each donut only has 1g. This fact alone makes it a healthier alternative and a better breakfast for a weight loss program, although the portion size is too big for most people. I also think that many average people who go through a D&D buy two donuts in a combo, but would only buy one bagel.

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I completely disagree, thou... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 9:46 AM | Posted, in reply to Anonymous's comment, by Avid Runner: | Reply

I completely disagree, though I see where you're coming from.

The multigrain bagel has the same number of carbs as the plain. You can certainly make the case that these are "better" carbs as they come from grain, and there is nominally more fiber, but the degree of processing of the grains is unknown. They could be refined to the point where they have the same glycemic index as white flour.

The increase in protein is laughable. It's an extra bite of chicken.

The message that I got from this post (and the one I happened already to agree with) is that "healthy" choices are rarely healthier, they are merely different-- fat for sugar, sugar for fat, etc.

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How much did the cookie wei... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 3:07 PM | Posted by Nik: | Reply

How much did the cookie weigh after making it a cracker? You promised answers.

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"... but that's if the chee... (Below threshold)

June 22, 2010 3:57 PM | Posted by Zo: | Reply

"... but that's if the cheese is spread by a bee."

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Ah, "fail", but what you ne... (Below threshold)

June 23, 2010 1:26 AM | Posted, in reply to Fail's comment, by Anonymous: | Reply

Ah, "fail", but what you neglect to appreciate is that in the northeeast dunkin donuts is like A BIG DEAL. Anyone who would dedicate an entire blog post to selecting an item from dunkin donuts CLEARLY lives in the north east. If you lived here, you would totally understand the obsessive, fanatical, and entirely puzzling way with which people here are fixated on this fast food chain.

In california or whatever they may have a dunkin donuts, but a native californian does not give 2 shits about dunkin donuts. To them dunkin donuts is like, any other fast food joint, and a bad one at that.

In new jersey and new york and new england and such, dunkin donuts is like... it's like dunkin donuts. It's like "I';m going out to get some DD, I'll BRB" and immediately everyone realizes the importance / significance of this act.

Clearly you are not from this area or else you would ahve understood why I knew he was from this area. ONly a person from this area spends a percentage of their time & brain energy thinking about DD.

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Yea, I thought that was a l... (Below threshold)

June 23, 2010 1:29 AM | Posted, in reply to Zo's comment, by Anonymous: | Reply

Yea, I thought that was a little odd too. Cute, but odd.

I mentally imagined a non-native english speaker saying it, like maybe borat or something. It's such an odd phrase.

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No, no ... I thought it was... (Below threshold)

June 23, 2010 1:33 AM | Posted, in reply to Anonymous's comment, by Zo: | Reply

No, no ... I thought it was friggin *genius*

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Yep, the "choice" between a... (Below threshold)

June 23, 2010 9:30 AM | Posted, in reply to Avid Runner's comment, by Anonymous: | Reply

Yep, the "choice" between a donut and a bagel is pretty much the same "choice" as one gets between BooBerry and Count Chocula cereal - it's really the illusion of choice. This is one of the "big lies" of consumerism, that more choice is being offered when it's really pretty much the same thing in every box just a different picture and name on the front. Most people buy a brand - an ephemeral concept that reflects upon their self image. They're paying and buying into the surface and have little real interest in the content (so much so that the branding will even contradict the actual content but,like the emperor and his new robes, the person who buys into the illusion will strut around revealing their naked ego (and ass) while presuming they're showing how glorious they are via their new clothes which they believe define them as being worthy and even superior human beings.

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I read an interesting artic... (Below threshold)

June 23, 2010 11:42 AM | Posted by sanitizer: | Reply

I read an interesting article in the Sunday Times which had suggestions of how to eat healthily; the one I thought was most useful - don't eat anything with an ingredient your great-grandmother wouldn't recognise as food... anything that includes High Fructose Corn Syrup fails that test hand's down!

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Best. Post. Ever.Go ... (Below threshold)

June 24, 2010 3:06 PM | Posted by Sarah G: | Reply

Best. Post. Ever.
Go donuts!

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fuck healthy. what's health... (Below threshold)

June 25, 2010 12:32 AM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

fuck healthy. what's healthy anyways? (unsatisfying)">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health>unsatisfying)

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LOOK AT THE FIBER IDIOT... (Below threshold)

June 27, 2010 11:29 AM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

LOOK AT THE FIBER IDIOT

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A bagel with cream cheese k... (Below threshold)

July 13, 2010 4:29 AM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

A bagel with cream cheese keeps me full for five hours. I'm hungry in an hour after I eat a donut or a muffin. Shouldn't this concept be taken into account when deciding what's healthy? I will never consider a bagel on an even keel with a donut for that reason alone.

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Hate to burst your bubble a... (Below threshold)

July 25, 2010 1:12 PM | Posted, in reply to Anonymous's comment, by Anonymous: | Reply

Hate to burst your bubble about where TLP lives, but I'm in Mississippi and we have a DD here.

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Muffin in = Muffin on. Muff... (Below threshold)

August 3, 2010 5:51 PM | Posted by mike: | Reply

Muffin in = Muffin on. Muffin tops for life.

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If I am going to get all th... (Below threshold)

August 18, 2010 2:22 PM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

If I am going to get all those empty calories, I will have a roast duck breast, mashed potatoes, roasted veggies, and chocolate mousse or homemade ice cream for dessert. I mean, really. REALLY.

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<a href="http://www.ndscard... (Below threshold)

November 8, 2010 10:03 PM | Posted by R4 DS: | Reply

Emulator Game Console WhiteNdscardsale is a famous Web sites which sales Of game cards in the world

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Fat in general is not unhea... (Below threshold)

July 26, 2014 4:08 PM | Posted by Rivka: | Reply

Fat in general is not unhealthy-it depends on what kind. Saturated and trans fats are unhealthy.
Carbohydrates are not intrinsically unhealthy. Having loads of carbohydrates that aren't accompanied by vitamins and minerals means you are getting a bunch of empty calories.
This post isn't taking those details into full consideration.

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