May 8, 2008

Cookie Monster Becomes Aware


cookie monster.jpg

An article from McSweeney's (I know, I know) called, Cookie Monster Searches Deep Within Himself, And Asks: Is Me Really Monster?

While humorous though predictable, I did catch a reply on Metafilter which, in my opinion, borders on genius:

They are all monsters, that's the point. The show is for children, don't forget. They are monsters the kids don't have to fear. The show's message for kids was "We know you're sometimes afraid of monsters, but not all monsters are bad.

Sometimes monsters can be cute and cuddly and quirky and funny. Elmo's a monster and he has such a cute giggle!. These are the good monsters.

Not like the monster sitting next to you on the sofa, watching the TV. Not like the monster WHO TOLD YOU FOR THE LAST TIME TO STOP CRYING.

Not like the monsters who kick your toys and curse under their breath. Not like the monsters who say you stole their youth and take pills because YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY. Not like the monsters who meet strange men at the door and leave you home alone. Not like the monsters who hit with their hands, or their words. Not like the monsters who come into your room at night stinking of whiskey and sweat, with madness in their eyes and a belt in their hands.

On Sesame Street, the monsters have not HAD ENOUGH, and they aren't doing it FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.

Your monsters are not brought to you by the number 4 or the letter M. Your monsters don't want you to come and play, they want you to LEAVE THEM ALONE.

Cookie monster is safe, and so are Elmo and the Count. Even Oscar and Bert are your friends even if they are bit grouchy or fussy. Your monsters think our monsters are harmless.

To them.

Your monsters bought you a Tickle-Me Elmo doll, didn't they? They bought it to JUST SHUT YOU UP ALREADY. So they let you play with Elmo and make him laugh and giggle. But Elmo doesn't just laugh and giggle. Elmo loves you, and he listens.

And he records.

And soon, Elmo is going to tell you exactly what to do.






Comments

I daresay that may be the b... (Below threshold)

May 8, 2008 2:11 PM | Posted by Fargo: | Reply

I daresay that may be the best thing I've read in some time. Thanks for sharing.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Wow, did Stephen King join ... (Below threshold)

May 8, 2008 2:21 PM | Posted by rbh: | Reply

Wow, did Stephen King join MetaFilter?

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 5 (5 votes cast)
Marvelously creepy.... (Below threshold)

May 8, 2008 3:27 PM | Posted by Rose: | Reply

Marvelously creepy.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 5 (5 votes cast)
> Not like the monster sitt... (Below threshold)

May 8, 2008 11:56 PM | Posted by Anonymous: | Reply

> Not like the monster sitting next to you on the sofa

I'm very sorry the metafilter poster knew all about this.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 7 (7 votes cast)
Hi,I'm interested ... (Below threshold)

May 12, 2008 6:08 AM | Posted by Florentina: | Reply

Hi,

I'm interested in purchasing a link on you site. Please, email me your rates.

Thank you,

Florentina

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (4 votes cast)
a great morality tale.<br /... (Below threshold)

May 12, 2008 11:19 AM | Posted by Diane Abus: | Reply

a great morality tale.
Best,Doc

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I think this post is tragic... (Below threshold)

June 29, 2008 6:20 PM | Posted by Bob: | Reply

I think this post is tragically sad. It trivialises the abuse that some children are subject to, whilst offering no sense of hope or proportion.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -8 (10 votes cast)
Holy crap. That came out of... (Below threshold)

June 30, 2008 3:08 AM | Posted by Amy: | Reply

Holy crap. That came out of left field.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
sounds like someone got pou... (Below threshold)

June 30, 2008 10:06 AM | Posted by a. c . crowley: | Reply

sounds like someone got pounded in the ass at a very early age. Not all parents suck as bad as yours, and a little smack on the ass when your kid sucks isn't a bad idea either. I am sorry your childhood was so miserable but there is no need to infect the rest of us with your remorse.
have a nice day.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -16 (20 votes cast)
I never spank my kids, I re... (Below threshold)

July 1, 2008 9:45 PM | Posted by Trisha: | Reply

I never spank my kids, I read to them every night, I go to the playground with them. I always saw myself as a great mom. But even I have to stop and rethink my parenting after reading this. What a very insightful person. I hope the knowledge comes from books and not personal experience.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (7 votes cast)
Great stuff!... (Below threshold)

July 2, 2008 11:49 AM | Posted by Sean: | Reply

Great stuff!

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Hi I would like to recommen... (Below threshold)

February 19, 2009 3:10 PM | Posted by malil: | Reply

Hi I would like to recommend you very useful file search - http://newfileengine.com/
You can find a lot of new movies, games and music there. Enjoy it!

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -2 (4 votes cast)
<a href="http://www.fashion... (Below threshold)

October 9, 2010 5:18 AM | Posted by iPhone Cases: | Reply

iPhone Cases
so good .Thanks for the information you post.

Thanks for posting this.

Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -3 (3 votes cast)
What if the task is impossi... (Below threshold)

April 11, 2014 10:20 PM | Posted by KarlYoung: | Reply

What if the task is impossible, you judgmental asshole?

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